Monday, November 26, 2007

Funtimes at the Dentist


So.... I haven't been to the dentist for... 6 years or something. Actually.... yeah, yeah, its 6 years. I stopped going once I had to start paying.

One of the side effects of having a free health service (not free- I fucking pay taxes, assholes!) is that you kind of resent having to pay for any kind of medical crap.

There ARE NHS dentists, but they are fucking impossible to find, so me and my family go to a private one. It's the same one I have always attended, and it is free upto the age of 18, but once you hit that magical one-eight, it's FUCKING INSANELY EXPENSIVE!

Remember how the dentist used to clean your teeth for you with those crazy tiny tooth brushes, and your teeth felt like they were made of marble when they were done? Well, no more, asshole, you have to pay £38 for 30 mins of being poked in the gums, and pay a further £40 for someone to SHOW YOU HOW TO BRUSH YOUR FUCKING TEETH.

I kind of KNOW how to brush my teeth, ok? I do it every single day of my goddamn life, alright asshole? Twice. so I kind of know the drill. If you will excuse the expression.


Ok, this actually has meaning. My wisdom tooth is trying to eat its way out of my face. It did this once before about 18 months ago, and it killed then, but now it hurts even worse. So I finally went to the dentist.

They gave me 'a checkup' Which was so fucking rudimentary!! And it cost me £38 fucking pounds!! I feel like I shoulda gotten a sticker or some shit at LEAST, if I am paying £38 to someone to tell me what I ALREADY FUCKING KNOW!! (that I have teeth, and that one of them is hurting).

Basically, they are not going to do anything about the tooth with actually is giving me problems. No. That, you just have to deal with missy. Sux2BU.

But they did do some xrays (£7 each) and gave me some antibiotics (£4.50) and told me that I have to come back and get some fillings (at least 3, maybe more) at £45 each. THATS GREAT, HOW ABOUT THE ONE THAT ACTUALLY HURTS??

As for the wisdom tooth, my dentist wants me to just not have anything done at all about it. I just have to live with it. WTF? I don't get it. I have a painful tooth. Give me the xrays, and take them out.

I payed for the exam and crap, and made an appointment to see the hygenist (I really fail to see why i have to pay someone to scrape the plaque (which does not exist) off of my teeth, and brush them (which I can do myself) £40)

Yeah I know its probably less than US bills, but whatfuckingever. I feel totally gypped. I went in for one thing and came out with something totally different. I honestly always feel like when you go to the garage or a phone shop and they upsell you all the crap you don't need and charge you throughthe nose for it.

Fucking dentists.but check out this weird movie poster!:
I'm hungry. Too bad I can't eat because of all that searing pain and whatnot.


Simon said...

I am surprised they would not remove an infected wisdom tooth, since it will likely get worse.

Canadian checkup and cleaning is about $80 with a filling being about $160. (no insurance)

I suggest getting a second opinion since you only get one set of teeth.

RJ said...

Time to see a new dentissstt...

Anonymous said...

British dentistry hey?
Although nowhere near as bad as US tubers want to believe, trying to find a dentist in the UK does suck.

My local dentist who is private has a 3yr waiting list FFS!

Anonymous said...

here in america they want to yank out every tooth, so they can charge your insurance company the maximum allowed per year (about $2000).

Anonymous said...


Here's your solution. I'll make a riddle for you--sort of.

What's funny is that I was holding and swishing it in my mouth before I even read this, and still am. I usually hold and swish it around in my mouth for 5 minutes, 3 times a day. Why? Because I had a toothache once that made me want to jump out of a window, and it took it away--compeletely away, after about 2 or 3 days. And, it makes my teeth really white.

What is this thing I speak of? They use it as rocket fuel at about a 90% concentration. Apparently, it completely cured Magic Johson of HIV/AIDS when delivered through an IV drip. It is the dentist's worst enemy because if more people regularly used it, (s)he'd be out of business. Bacteria shrinks in its presence. It's the enemy of gum disease. It's the enemy of cavities. It's the cure for a tooth ache. If your gums recede as you age, it actually builds them back up. It makes your teeth very white. Your grandmother has it in her medicine cabinet. Your mother has it in her medicine cabinet. A big bottle of it cost no more than a candy bar. It's what major corporations put in expensive dental products, and teeth whiteners, as the MAIN AND SOMETIMES ONLY INGREDIENT, and then wrap in fancy packaging so they can sell it to you for some hideous amount of money. It comes in a brown plastic bottle and sells for about $1.50 US for a giant, 32 Fluid Ounce Bottle. You can get it anywhere--drug store, supermarket etc.

It's Hydrogen Peroxide, Paper--good ole' H202. Swig it like you were swigging that NyQuil cold medicine that got you drunk the other day. Except, DON'T drink it. Just let it rest in your mouth a few times a day for the next few days--about 5 minutes at a time. I'm laying odds that your problem will go away. The peroxide will kick the hell out of that bacteria. Good luck.


BadAlbert said...

Dentist visits are indeed no fun. Luckily I'm on the family dental plan with a private dentist, especially since I had about a whole year's worth of work needing done. I hadn't been for years either. A couple of my wise teeth are impacted but no way am I having those out. I rather like to avoid facial pain wherever possible..

manapa99 said...

ahhh the dentist...
well i feel for you, i hate them and the fact that they seems to be a 90% bs rip off.
It sucks having to pay i'm a poor college kid with no coverage here in the US. I know i'm not alone too old to be on my parents plan and too poor to afford the outragous monthly costs... Just so happens i have very few problems lol *crosses his fingers for the next 2 years of school*
ah well it sucks hope that tooth gets better i had mine removed a couple years back. No problems since. The eye doctor... well that place is just a scam....

Linear Zap said...

It's actually nice to know that I'm not the only one that has been ripped off by dentists...!

Finding a dentist is really difficult in France. But a visit like yours would have cost about £25-30 (the price is set by the government), which is already waaaay too much for being told how to brush your teeth.

(not) Amusingly it happened to me last year - my teeth were (and had always been) in perfect shape, and after checking my teeth (this took about... oh, 30 long seconds), he told me how to brush my teeth.


But still. I suppose he was feeling bad for charging me £30 for looking at my teeth during 30 seconds (that's £1 a second!), so he gave me this totally unnecessary "extra".

...I hope your tooth will stop hurting soon! :)

Alexandrou said...

Medicine in private clinics is becoming too much of a business nowadays, which is good for the doctors who are getting paid a hell of a lot more than those working in the public section but its a little ridiculous.

Jason W said...

Haha. I love your rants Bryony.

In Australia I also had free dentist work while in school. I haven't gone since (at least 8 years) as I've had no symptoms of anything going wrong.

Like many others, I've never been fond of visiting the dentist...

MartinL said...

Seems you dont like the dentist :P

Nhs are monsters, i was 5 and had to get 4 teeth out, couldnt eat for 24 hours before they took my teeth out, then they put me on gas (that was pretty cool though) and yanked my teeth out, and woke me up again!!! no painkillers no nothing, my gums were bleeding like hell and they did jack all about it!!! (my parents did give me 5 quid though :P)

DutchGirl107 said...

Ah that sucks! I've never had anything wrong with my teeth! Lucky me ;)

I am still free, but will be turning 18 pretty soon so that'll be over then...

I'm very lucky with the dentist I have. I have had him all my life and he's the best. OK, don't like him poking in my mouth, but he's damn good at his job and really nice. My mum has had him for like 30 years now..

Good luck...

notashot said...

Fricken' dentists. I was living in Birmingham when my wisdom teeth came in. I had to wait until I moved back to the States before I could get them pulled. But it still cost me about a grand US to get my mouth in order.

Can anyone say, "Health Tourism?" I hear China is nice this time of year.

Amy said...

Wow, that's like the opposite of the US. The last year or so my dentist has been trying to get me to have my wisdom teeth removed because "they'll be hard to brush". Seriously? I can fucking brush them rather than have SURGERY in my mouth, thanks. Otherwise they're fine and I have a good track record in terms of oral hygiene. So really, American dentists are just looking for any reason, no matter how flimsy, to remove wisdom teeth. Wtf? The opposite of your issue.

vclamp said...

When it comes to using rocket fuel for mouthwash, instead of using T-Stoff (80% hydrogen peroxide) I'd go with the 3% solution that is at teh store. This will keep ones head from exploding. ;)

Staticharge said...

Here in America, the Democrats try to say that universal healthcare is the way to go against the crooked healthcare industry, since they're just in it to make money by giving the least possible coverage when you need it (which of course is no surprise). Films like Michael Moore's 'Sicko' make the British system sound great and completely free (taxes aside). But then the Republicans here say your all's healthcare is awful, that you're pulling your own teeth with pliers, waiting months to get seen, and have low survival rates for various illnesses. I don't particularly believe them, because the majority of that party is corrupt. Not that I entirely believed the Democrat side with everything about Britain's system being awesome and great either. But after hearing from someone that actually lives there, I have a bit better perspective now on the issue I think. It's maybe better than what we have, but still a pain in the ass and rips you off.

Of course I'd still like to at least try having universal healthcare, because I don't even remember the last time I went to a dentist!

tejayce said...

i have several things i want to say,
first of all: yea, thats exactly how most doctors behave, i hate that too.
but the thing is: if you dont want to pay .. TELL THEM (to go fuck themselves ;) its sad, but hell .. whats better .. pay insane amounts of money .. or .. a bit of conflict with an ass whos trying to rip you off?

it would be interesting, why he doesnt want to do anything. maybe the tooth is only coming out. nothing really wrong about that. mine are "growing" horizontaly, now thats nasty. i had 2 of them pulled this year. the doc severed a nerve and a part of my chin feels numb now.
but he gave you antibiotics .. so it seems smth is wrong. my guess is, he first needs you to take them, and after that he can pull em out. thats what i had to do. the mouth is full of nasty stuff which can get into your blood when they pull a tooth (big hole). especialy if that tooth is somehow infected. so you need those antibiotics. but then again .. he would have given you an appointent for pulling the teeth .. so .. ehm .. wtf!!

dont go to the hygenist. just dont, they just came up with that stuff to make money.. thats my opinion. my mum even complained about some unpleasant consequences i think. afaik they dont only brush your teeth, they destroy the whole natural environment of the teeth by scratching everything off, so that cannot be good imo.

i hope the pain will stop soon or you find a solution. good luck!

SimUK said...

I also have mega bad toothache today, and also haven't been to the dentist for ages (I don't want to think how long - I just have a fear of them, and a hate for their money charging antics) so I feel your pain ... in more ways than one right now *ouch* I don't take anything, ever, not even for headaches, although today I did take an Anadin Extra Soluable, which seems to have helped a little.

Anyway, the other thing I wanted to say was as you're working now it'll cost you money, but did you know it all becomes magically free when you're unemployed? (you should have gone a few months ago!) Imagine the savings you could make on a really major bit of tooth-fixing!

Tucker said...

Ugh, I know. That sucks!

I have never had to worry about the dentist because my parents have always had good insurance and I have never gotten a cavity.

But I haven't gotten my teeth cleaned since I was like fifteen, and I am eighteen now, need to get it done.

Hate the dentist!!!!